Archive for the ‘Humor’ Category
Honestly, I don’t no too much about sidescrollers. The only two I’ve played are the old Sonic games (Sonic 1 to 3, not 4) and a Mario or two. But I play more as a hedgehog than a plummer.
So why talk about them at all, you might ask?
For a few reasons: to mull and rant about something I can’t change, to talk about how we’ve moved from a side view to a 360 camera angle over the years, and . . . to say that I’m not dead, I just haven’t updated in a while.
Well, *ahem*, on with the rant.
I find sidescrollers very interesting, and when I do play them I find myself in a complete virtual world at my full control, all within a single and unchanging camera angle. Sidescrollers hold both limited and unlimited possibilities. I say limited because you have a single camera angle and, in some cases, a single direction, because sometimes once you’ve crossed to a further point on the screen, there’s no turning back thanks to an invisible barrier.
And I say unlimited . . . because if the camera angle can’t change, that doesn’t mean your direction can’t.
In sidescrollers, entire worlds can be found, but not just on the main surface, because just because we can’t go left doesn’t mean we can’t go up. Hidden passages and secret doors can be discovered underneath your feet, or high up into the stratosphere. You can walk on clouds, or burrow to the earth’s core. Just make sure you bring extra lives.
Video games have evolved enormously since the era of sidescrollers. We’ve gone from a side view to a first person angle, and the camera can be rotated a full circle in most games, so you can see more to your character than just the side. Some game developers, however, still try to revive the old sidescrolling classics, such as Sega’s Sonic 4, a 3D sidescroller which was a continuation to the sidescrollers of the 1990s. Numerous flash games have taken the sidescroller to the next level, creating unique gameplay and story that fits snugly into the genre. The sidescroller has attached on to many different types of games, such as point-and-click, shooting, adventure, and horror.
We’ve gone up and up with sidescrollers, creating games that are different but special, adding on to the age-old game play. And yet, when you play a simple sidescroller, all you have to do is turn right.
And the adventure beings.
Homework piled up on Wednesday, May 11. Social Studies, Math, English . . . you name it, it was there. But there was a problem with doing it in my room, where I usually do it.
The birds were chirping like crazy.
My sister’s bird, Evelyn Gray, and my bird, Miss. Dexter, were craving attention- and possibly food- and were screaming so loud I could hear them from my room on the second floor (Miss. Dexter’s name actually has a story behind it, but that’s for a different time)
So I decided to put them both on my shoulders- a feat I had only done once before, for you see, both birds weren’t exactly comfortable together. Miss. Dexter was a very calm bird, but she was scared of Evelyn, because Evelyn Gray would snap at everything and everyone- except my sister. But with my grades at stake, I walked to the family room where both their cages were, put both birds on my shoulders, got some paper towel from the kitchen in case any of them wanted to do their business on me, and walked upstairs.
After a few minutes, I was surprised to see them both sitting very calmly, even preening themselves, and Evelyn Gray wasn’t snapping at me like usual. I suppose she just wanted attention, and it didn’t matter who gave it to her.
Soon I was on to my Social Studies homework, the last assignment of the day, and I decided to take a break. So I put Evelyn Gray on my Social Studies book, because her sharp cockatiel feet were digging into my shoulder. So she waked off my book and climbed on the moderate-sized stack of other school books on my desk.
Now, we were reading The Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boom in our English class, and that was on top of the stack. And the old, worn copies the school provided showed off a two-inch Corrie face on it, with some other things in the background behind her. Evelyn Gray walked on the book, and I saw some of her tail feathers lower. Don’t- I started to think.
But it was too late. She proceeded to do her business- right smack in the middle of Corrie Ten Boom’s face! And the little bird looked quite pleased about it.
I hope you got a laugh out of this, because I sure did when it occurred.
Ninja Bodyguard is in progress. I’m having a brain freeze right now . . .
Well, here’s a funny video. I mean, who’s ever seen a flying lawn mower before?